We saw you this week on Monday. I have an entire 35-minute video of the scan. I have decided not to post it because, well, in all honesty you both look like space aliens. Please don’t hold this against me when you’re 40. When you get old enough to view this video, I am certain you will agree. Don’t worry. I am saving it for you. Two copies.
I have to tell you, it is pretty amazing what you can see at only 12-weeks and 1-day old. Harlow, you are still the mover and the shaker. Harper, you are quite the little zen sleeper. We think we know both of the sexes, but it’s not 100%. When we are sure, I’ll write about it. In the meantime, the doctor said you are both perfect. He literally used that word. Of course, I could have told him that — but don’t let it go to your head.
We saw all the hemispheres of your brains, your spine, you little eyes and noses. Really, you look just like little alien people. Harlow, I think you have your Daddy’s neck.
This week you are a little bit bigger than a key lime and weigh slightly more than a 1/2 an ounce each. You are apparently beginning to demonstrate reflexes with grasping, sucking and hiccups. I wonder what I am doing to give you hiccups? I do not enjoy hiccups. I can’t imagine you do either.
We get to see you next week, too! I am hoping we can confirm your sex. I am ready to start sewing.
Before I ramble any further into this letter, I just want to thank both of you. Thank you for choosing me to be your Mama and your Daddy to be your Daddy. It’s an awesome responsibility, and one I will never take lightly. I’ll also try to not over-think it, but I made need some help on this.
We all three went to Chaz’s yoga class for the first time since the night before Dr. K transferred you into your Mama. We did go on a yoga retreat about a month ago, but as far as my regular flow yoga class — Wednesday was my first go at it. It was hot and sweaty and hard. I had such a good time on Wednesday; I decided to go to Ellen’s class on Thursday. Today is Friday and we are tired. I can feel all of those muscles in my arms screaming at me.
There were moments in both yoga classes when I thought; what am I doing here? I should be home drinking a banana shake … or better yet, we should be asleep.
All of that incredible strength I had in my upper body at the end of my 67 days on the mat was lingering. It was not totally gone, but given the fact that my breasts weigh more and my tummy is popping out — yoga is going to take some getting used to in this new body. I could feel you rumbling around in there throughout the class. I think you like yoga. The good news is, I was not nauseous. I had the energy to get through it, even though I had to modify some things and do more Child’s poses than I ever did before. But that’s okay, because you know what? I’m building a couple of perfect dumplings.
As I type these letters I keep thinking about what I would want to know about from my own Mama or my Mawmaw or Memom? What would I ask them if I were a dumpling in the womb? I don’t know really. I can only think about what I wish I knew at 43. Dumplings aren’t supposed to have questions yet; they’re too busy in there learning to hiccup and wave.
In life, each chapter arrives at different times for different people. Some people get married early and have a baby and then they go back to school and become a dentist (like your Grandma Kay). Some people go to school and get established in their career and then they start a family. Some people decide they’re having too much fun on their own to mess with all of that family stuff. And some people, like your Daddy and me, do a whole bunch of things for a long time and then we have babies.
I honestly do not think there is a right way or a wrong way — as long as you obey the law and all. There is your way and ultimately, that is the best way for the journey you are traveling in this life. We each have a unique path, and for this, we should all be grateful.
I was looking through some old papers the other day and I found my Bucket List I had written when I was about 27-years old. A bucket list is a list of things you want to do before you die. I have always liked having a bucket list. I think goals and dreams are good for people to have, it keeps you young and active and always working towards something. Maybe someday you’ll have a bucket list of your own?
As I looked through my old Bucket List, I decided it needed some updating. I am not going to share it all with you today, but I will tell you about the first five things on the list. Before starting on the trivial (but fun) stuff — I wrote down the five most important things to achieve in my life. I decided if I never swam with dolphins or went on a African safari, I would be okay. However, the first five items are more of my life’s work, as opposed to a simple list of things to do.
1.) Make health a top priority
2.) Raise healthy, happy, curious and kind children
3.) Find our forever home and make it our dream home
4.) Work towards living debt free
5.) Try to honor God, our parents and our history in everything we do
See, these are all things I never thought about when I was 25 — perhaps I was starting to think about them at 35, a little. As I wrote them down, I thought this is my life’s work; not a Bucket List. So that is my ‘Life’s Work’ List, which may or may not be a new sort of list. I have no idea.
Just remember as you go through life, people will impart all sorts of wisdom and ideas about how you should and why you should do certain things. There are some important things I wish I had known and done, and as you get older, I will focus on telling you those. If you are anything like your Mama, you will probably nod and smile – then do whatever your heart is telling you to do. Your Daddy was a little better at listening to his parents, so I secretly hope you are more like him in that regard.
Even now, as I get ready to bring two perfect dumplings into the world, I realize friends and family and random people on the street are never done giving you advice and ideas. After only 12-weeks I have already received countless emails on how to get you to sleep, eat, stop nausea, where to shop, how to shop and so much more. I am thrilled for the information, and I have luckily found a way to file it so I do not get overloaded.
Every week I find more amazing blogs of creative women doing inspiring things. This week I found a website called Aesthetic Nest. Wow. She really knows how to throw a cool birthday party. When that time comes, look out!
In the meantime, we’ll keep going to yoga and attempt to make healthy food choices – and most importantly, I’ll try to savor all the moments I can between the nausea and exhaustion. It is slowly but surely getting better.
I hope I didn’t overload you today. Maybe it was a little too much sharing for one letter. Ah, well. Get used to it.